I’ve had some “woe-is-me” kind of days lately and I don’t like them.  Thankfully these self-centered, uncomfortable feelings don’t last long, because in my heart, I know that I am abundantly blessed.  I’m truly aware that my life could be so very different, and much worse.   So, I’m not ungrateful; I just momentarily lose my joy from time to time!  Lord, please forgive me and thank YOU for Your care and blessing in so many ways!  Help me remember that you have told us to “Count it all joy when we fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.”  James 1:2-4.

But, speaking as a widow for now more than five years, I still miss my husband a hundred different ways every single day!  For me, the old lyrics of “It’s So Nice to Have a Man Round the House” ring true.  Of course, the lonely days are a given.   But also, having someone to talk to, to help in making decisions and in spending money, all change when you are suddenly alone to navigate through daily living!  Physically maintaining house and yard becomes monumental.  Easy household fixes that most men can manage, leave me clueless and dependent on willing and handy friends.

The past few weeks have been rough, as all of this has seemed bigger than life itself.  About two months ago, I suddenly lost the sight in my right eye.  The doctors tell me it is a permanent thing, and I am learning to cope, but eyesight is a wonderful thing!  Thankfully, I can still see well enough to drive (and it’s legal to drive with one eye in Ohio), but it’s a strange new thing and my eyesight is now limited!  It’s sort of like having a sheer scarf over my head all the time.  In addition, now my contacts need to be tweaked, and I need stronger reading glasses, as well as new regular glasses when I don’t wear my contacts.  That has involved multiple appointments with a new optometrist and several specialty ophthalmologists, all at new, unfamiliar places.  Thank you, friends, who have graciously driven me to some of these appointments.

My internet and cable bills have seemed overly expensive, so I recently decided to switch carriers.  When, out of necessity, a new line had to be installed in my yard and configurations changed; when I had two technicians in and out of my house on different days; when my new phone was unfamiliar; when my passwords had to be updated (and remembered); when I had to talk with people that barely speak English and who ask me questions to which I don’t really know how to answer… then, I doubted my decision to switch.  I was comforted by the cute young man who clicked away on my new phone to set up the new features, and who said more than once, “I got you!”

There are many ways my friends and neighbors have comforted me and shown concern for me in the past months and years.  I’m grateful for each one.

I could relate other difficult times that have happened to me lately, but I know my stories are not unique.  We all go through these kinds of things.  Life can be burdensome and heartbreaking.  I was outside this afternoon when I heard the organist at the Central College Presbyterian Church playing “Come Ye Thankful People Come”.  Those lyrics are such a good reminder: “God, our Maker, doth provide for our wants to be supplied. Come to God’s own temple, come; Raise the song of harvest home.”  God allows these niggly trials to come so that we can learn to trust Him even when nothing makes sense.  He asks us to put our faith completely in Him when the pain is the worst.

Mary Southerland said when God pushes us to the edge, we must trust Him fully.  Only two things can happen.  God will either “catch you when you fall, or He will teach you how to fly.  Either way, God’s got you!  Now that is true comfort!